Better Internet for Kids

Sexting is a contraction of the words “sex” and “texting”, referring to the exchange of messages, pictures or videos of a sexual nature through a digital medium. Exchanging sexual images or messages is a way of experimenting with sexuality, at any time and at any age. So sexting can be part of healthy sexual development, where young people fully test and shape their (sexual) identity.

What's the best way to talk about sexting?

• Talk about it spontaneously by reacting to certain events, such as a TV program, a radio interview or a sexting situation that occurred at school.
• Give your child privacy: secretly watching or controlling what your child sends and to whom is not good for your relationship of trust.
• Discuss it positively and openly: this increases the chances that your child will come to you with a problem. If your child finds it difficult to talk to you as a parent, refer him or her to someone else you trust (a youth leader, a teacher or an organization such as Child Focus).

What to discuss?

• Consent is central: no one should ever coerce or persuade you to do something you don't want to do. Sexting is only acceptable if both people involved want to do it. If only one person has any doubts, don't do it. Sending a nude without being asked is absolutely unacceptable and, what's more, punishable (in Belgium).  
• Sexting should only take place between people who trust each other. Receiving a nude is an intimate gift. You need someone you trust to receive one. Don't betray that trust.  
• Once a picture is online, it's not easy to delete it. Once you've sent a nude, you have no control over what happens next. Therefore, think very carefully before sending one.
• Sexting is safer if you're not recognisable. This means:
  • your face is not visible,
  • your tattoos, piercings, birthmarks, accessories or other distinctive features are not visible, and
  • the background is neutral or without posters or other recognisable elements.

Find more information about the work of the Belgian Safer Internet Centre, including its awareness raising, helpline, hotline, and youth participation services, or find similar information for other Safer Internet Centres throughout Europe.