Better Internet for Kids

What exactly is sexting?

Sexting refers to a phenomenon in which people (and increasingly teenagers or younger) text each other about sex through various electronic devices. The most common examples are messages, photos or videos with sensitive and intimate content.

Anna (alias), 12 years old, dated Peter (alias), 13 years old, for about a month and took part in their relationship by sending him private pictures of herself from time to time. Unfortunately, after a few weeks, they broke up after a petty quarrel and Peter posted the intimate pictures and videos on his Facebook and Instagram profiles. Before long, everyone was laughing at Anna and sent her unpleasant messages.

Nurturing intimacy is a natural part of forming relationships. These days, relationships often take place online, and a breach of trust might occur under certain circumstances: content intended for just one specific person might be shared publicly. Today, teenagers are more willing to trust and send sensitive content to people they are not familiar with.

Irreversible consequences

Once released, sensitive online material – such as nudes – can become a powerful tool of evil in the wrong hands: the misuse of photos, threats to post videos that you do not want anyone to see, blackmail, and reputational damage to the victim are all likely consequences. As such, children and young people become more than just physically exposed; manipulation and psychological pressure are equally exploited by the attacker. 

Anna felt very ashamed; she often cried and was afraid to tell anyone. She also felt physically sick at times. Eventually she confided in a friend who called the Safety Line with her. There, the lady advised her to tell her mother. In the end, her parents further helped Anna, and now she knows very well that she should not send private pictures to anyone.

Seznam.cz, a Czech web portal and search engine, discovered an alarming fact during its research in cooperation with the Centre for the Prevention of Risky Virtual Communication at Palacký University in Olomouc: 1 in 10 children in the Czech Republic voluntarily share risky photos and videos on the internet. The situation does not always turn out as Anna’s case did; the consequences can be very serious for the victim, and some cases have ended very badly. In some cases, the original subjects of intimate pictures or videos have committed suicide because they did not know where to go or who to talk to. They felt ashamed and felt that no one would help them.

In addition, it is very difficult to undo what has been done; it is almost impossible to completely delete content once it’s been published online. Unfortunately, such material might even resurface years later, when it is unexpected or indeed long forgotten.

So what can I do?

Of course, the best practice is to try to prevent the situation described above from occurring at all. This means not creating sensitive or intimate material in the first place, and not sending it to anyone – even close friends or current partners – if you do. You never know how things might end, and the moment you send a photo, message or video, you completely lose control over it.

The role of parents is crucial here. Parents should explain to children and young people why it is important to behave carefully on the internet (and beyond), and to respect the rules to safely handle sensitive material. If the family can establish an open relationship full of trust, the child will not be afraid to confide and ask for help in difficult times, regardless of the scenario.

Some practical tips

• Prove it. If you’re a victim of online bullying, abuse or other misconduct involving sensitive material, keep the evidence and don’t delete any of the threats received.
• You are not alone. Tell your parents, teachers, friends, or people you trust, or contact the Safety Line 116 111 by phone, chat or email. It‘s anonymous, free of charge and operates 24 hours a day.
• Stop. Make it clear to the offender that you want the incriminating material removed immediately. Call the police (dial 158 in the Czech Republic). The misuse of intimate material falls into the category of offences and is dealt with by the criminal police. Additionally, an offender dealing with material featuring underage individuals commits a crime related to child sexual abuse material and faces up to several years in prison.
• Do not respond to the aggressor.
• Don’t show your face. If you do decide to take intimate pictures, ensure that your face is not visible and that you can't be identified.

Read the original article on the Linka Bezpečí blog. Additionally, find related tips on how to deal with sexuality and online relationships on the Better Internet for Kids (BIK) portal.

Find out more about the work of the Czech Safer Internet Centre, including its awareness raising, helpline, hotline and youth participation services – or find similar information for Safer Internet Centres throughout Europe.